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In Ashes: How To Get Your Heart Together After A Break-Up

By Isabell Gaylord

At some point in our lives, we all have experienced heartbreak. It might be that someone you were in love with broke up their relationship with you or you were the one who had to break up with someone you. There is also the possibility that you just lost someone so dear to you to the cold hands of death. The chances are high that you will experience both at some point in your life if you have not already. It is also possible that you are currently at that point in your life and you need some succor. These things certainly hurt and your heart might be broken but it is definitely not something you can’t overcome. It is one event in life that every human would have to go through. Some once, some twice, thrice or even more times. One thing you must learn to do is stand up, get your heart together, have a positive mindset and move on afterward. How do you do this?

Here are some ways to help you get over a heartbreak.


  1. Let The Feeling Out

There are many people who choose to lock their feelings up in the head or in their heart after a heartbreak. But the truth is, you are hurting. No matter how much you try to hide it, you know what is going on inside you even if you are everywhere laughing and playing with everyone as nothing has happened. If you really want to get over a heartbreak, then you should let those hurtful feelings out of you. It is okay to cry, scream, shout, and be angry. There are different ways to process and express pain. Do it the best way you can. But what you should never do is try to keep it to yourself or dwell too long on the pain.

The essence of letting the feeling out is so that you can let it go. So, you do not have to soak them in and live in them every day. This might take some bravery on your part. It might take some time and energy, and a lot of work from you. But ultimately, it is the first step to recovering from the heartbreak.

  1. Forgive And Let Go

If you broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, then they definitely did something to wrong you that made you break up. The same way, if they broke up with you, you might feel wrong, especially if you have put so much in the relationship and you do not think you deserved something that cruels from them. To get over those feelings of hurt, you have to forgive them. It might be hard for you to do especially since it is likely not solicited. But if you will not do it because of them, then do it because of yourself. So that you can heal.

Just as Maya Angelou, an essay writer and one of the foremost leaders at AssignmentGeek put it: “It is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody.” You feel less hurt by what they did to you the moment you forgive them. Forgiveness means that you are letting them go, not just the act but also the pain that comes with it.

Forgiveness allows you to move on from the pain and build a better life for yourself. If it would help you, you could write a letter of forgiveness to them. Of course, you do not have to get it delivered to them. You could just write it and place it somewhere safe in your home. The point in writing is to release and express all of the emotions that you have stored up in you. This way you are able to move on more easily.

time healts

  1. Don’t Look Back

If your loved one just died, then you know that there is no possibility of you two coming back together again. So, you have no choice but to forge ahead and move on with your life. But it is more complicated if someone breaks up with you. There is always that part of you that still wants them back and secretly harbors the hope that you two will get over whatever misunderstandings that between you guys and come back together. This is in no way a bad thing, if it happens, good for you two. But if it does not, then you really have to look forward and not backward.

Of course, it would be totally impossible to forget someone you were so in love with, at least not immediately. But endeavor to take steps daily to move on from them. You do not have to stalk them on social media. As a matter of fact, it is good if you can delete them from your WhatsApp, unfriend them on Facebook, and unfollow them on Instagram and Twitter. You are not being childish, you are only trying to move on. Some people might be able to move on without doing any of these but if you have to, do it. Delete their cell phone numbers too. You could get back all of these once you are over them. But for the time being, do what you can to move on from them. The memories will keep coming back as long as you trigger it and these are very strong triggers.

  1. Take Back Control Of Your Life

Trying to move on from someone might mean trying to rebuild your life. You probably built your life around them because you thought you were going to be together forever. But that is not the case. You are no longer together. So, pick yourself up and rebuild your life around you and you alone. It might also be a good idea to go out and meet new people. Make new friends. This is one sure way to move on from someone that was in your life. Bring someone else in. It does not have to be in the same capacity but having someone else that you can open up and talk to in place of them helps you get over them pretty quickly.

About the Author

author Isabell Gaylord is a professional content writer and journalist. She also offers professional writing services on various writing services online. She has spent many years offering custom essay helpand will occasionally offer online assignment help upon request. She’s interested in spirituality and psychology.


The above guest post is published based on the premise that it will be helpful and informative. The opinions made within it are those of the author and not of The links you may find within this post do not necessarily imply our recommendation or endorsement of the views expressed within them.


dissertation introduction chapter writing says:

Just find a hobby, don't look back, try to keep yourself busy and don't concentrate on the problem

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